Eastern Canadian World Tour 2002

by rap legend Jesse Dangerously

supported by
Daniel Nissenfeld
Daniel Nissenfeld thumbnail
Daniel Nissenfeld There is so much to this album. I have been listening to it for what seems to be half of my life at this point.

Equal portions self indulgence and biting social commentary the only way you will understand is to listen. Favorite track: Jane Purves (This Song Is About Schools).
(free) 01:49
(free) 04:14
(free) 04:01
(free) 03:59
(free) 04:22
(free) 03:42
(free) 03:10
(free) 03:51
(free) 04:47
(free) 03:21


These songs were originally intended for two different projects - a vinyl EP called "Get Fresh Shall Be The Whole of the Law" and a CD called "My Record After The Record After This One". They were each to be comprised of tracks written after the 1997-2001 period that produced the bulk of what became "How To Express Your Dissenting Political Viewpoint Through Origami", but when Jesse got an opportunity to embark upon his first tour with the Backburner crew, he knew he'd be a sucker to step out with no product to slang. So he forced Fresh Kils into a slavish endeavour, making tracks that were barely demos into a release that was "good enough".

As with the BREAK cassette, all beats on this album were produced by Jesse D. The only guest MC is Wordburglar on "Strictly Do This" (which also appeared on Burg's eponymous debut EP), but a lot of Jesse's friends from many walks of life loaned their recitation of the title to the chorus of "Get Fresh". It was a lot of fun to put together!

The original tour editions of the CD were imitation vinyl discs, with hand-cut labels and specially designed mini-sleeves. People thought that was cute


released August 1, 2002

all raps and beats by jesse d
good cuts by Uncle Fester
mediocre cuts by Bad DJ Budget Cuts
terrible cuts by Worse DJ Bargain Bins


all rights reserved



rap legend Jesse Dangerously Ottawa, Ontario

Genuine Independent Rap Legend (GIRL)

member of Backburner crew

partially culpable for the nerdcore problem

"Sapphire meets Sappho meets Saafir meets Jonathan Saffron Foer;"
"not the Black Frank White, just the white Frank Black;"
"Wiz Khalifa meets Pat Califia;"
"like Buck 65 but faster and fat."
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Track Name: Celebrity Nudes
Tattered, ragged with vicious bruises
Trying to appease the capricious muses
Flying trapeze, excuses excuses
The type of guy you want nothing to do with
Who's this unfortunate cluttering up the hallway?
(Someone Christ, king of the jews) Yeah, that's what they all say!
They all say Jesse but they really can't see me
Since I got a little fame like Billy Danzini
One ring for Batman, one ring to RUN TINGS
One ring for fronting or flossing or something
I'm the unreliable, lovable laugh riot
You claim you got wits, I admit you're half right
Weedsmoker, living la vida loca, you're mediocre
Thuggin' Karaoke vivid video curmudgeon
Sergeant to the corporal punishment, punk,I'm brandishing
Brand X blandishments. Complaints? Take it to management.
Dink, I write my rhymes in vanishing ink
On a medium that's flammable, I'm a manacled animal
Mandibles gnashing, my passion's understandable
Instinctive action, smashing like a cannonball
...to the hundred and Nth degree, plus the fears
Play tricks on your perception when you fence the three musketeers
Hence if we formed like constructicons and insecticons
We'd be like snakes to ireland, raining destrucion on the leprechauns
Instructions for the clever pawns on how to overthrow the rooks
And bishops using techniques that geniuses would overlook
I know the crooked path and I pervert it for the cause of good
My will is stainless steel while conventions and laws are wood
And sometimes necessity is the mother of ax blades and flak jackets
For fat rabbits in fast raising tax brackets
Sabbath Black Sabbath, my abacus computes
Mathematical roots for all you fatuous galoots

Superman Batman (Look at me go!x2)
Batman Spiderman (Follow me now!x2)
TMNT Superman (Look at me go!x2)
Spiderman Batman (Follow me now!x2)

Coming o-
riginal, send a hot signal to the sonogram
Old school DOS box, flossing with a ton of RAM
Handkerchief monogrammed, monacled eyepiece
Baby grand piano if I wanna tickle the ivories
No political diatribes, dissertations, academia
WHAT! We're the royal macadamia nuts!
You want zany? That's us! I must proceed and continue
I sold out, by which I mean I filled every seat in the venue
Nothing to eat on the menu so I synthesize recipes
Winterized tires, you'll never get the best of me
Jesse D, A N G E R O U S L and sometimes
Y... lamping in the sunshine to unwind
I... am imaginary, actually magical
Casually, I manifest the fantastical
STAR! I behave in a famous way
And rep for Backburner, even though the name is gay
(What a thing to say!) Such a shameless play
For controversial commercial success in a painless way
My other band's rehearsal cassettes went double platinum
Flying off the shelves so fast the stores had trouble trackin'em!
Back in um... (effect?) effect, thanks! Where
Would I be without my friends? I draw a lot of blank stares!
We aren't gangst-airs, we're just twenty-somethings
Who grew up on rap and won't tolerate any fronting
Moth to the flame, I came up in the Maritimes
Y'all shift the blame, I shift the paradigms
Of saracen science, when you parrot I'm embarrassed
Pearls before swine, horse before the carriage
No fair, it's like using the rod before the carrot
I'm sorry if I'm seeing the flaws before the merits
I'm not so sure Americans can overcome soda pop
You'll never be huge, so go photoshop celebrity nudes!
Track Name: Conspiracy Is Us
Conspiracy? What conspiracy? The only conspiracy is us!
One thing I'll grant you, the conspiracy knows us well. Regard the
Monster hollering "BLAH!" at the Roosevelt Tharpa concert
Slipping unseen between the billboards of obscene inverted sponsorship
The queen of all I survey - is that too much to be asking of fate?
I see myself as a hardcore, modern day, cardboard Catherine the Great
I'm Alexander, double-forged in the fires provided by Salamander
In the marketplace of my fellow man, the archivist K. Kolin Korreander
Only, more demanding with my sword of minus one to hit Armour Class Zero
Portrait of the artist as a working class hero
Potboiler protagonist, the name on the lips of pretty girls
Rottweiler philanthropist... okay that didn't mean anything
Kid you not I kid you not you're not the living Wonder Mike
You're like the final innings of an unforgiving hunger strike
O verhypedandun derripe and by contrast, to all appearances
The crew I throw my lot-in with-is composed of solid lyricists
Alcoholics peer amid the sands for your oasis
Hands atremble as problems assemble the drug neither answers nor erases
You're just trying to fend off rabies with the hair of the dog that bit you
But not even you believe you're out of the woods just because you can't focus on the issue
It's not good. It's not good. It's not good, God bless you
It's not good. It's not good. It's not good, you poor thing.
Living the lie full time, a good thirty-five to forty hours a week
It's like the Wall, we all turn deaf and blind and cold and lose our power to speak
I wish I were the meek so I could draw a line of credit against the inheritance
That I'd been guaranteed but as it stands I'll be relying on my arrogance
And silent errantry, transparencies overhead
Avoid the eyes of Seraphim, guess I didn't know the ledge

The olderIget, the quickerIdie I hope there's time to reconfigureit
In hopes to do more than frigwithit, I need a freakincigarette
Not true, I never have, you needn't be a sanctimonious punk
To breathe the air. Now just who is the loneliest monk?
Me, that's who! You're only as drunk as the waxing moon
Just lamp until the cows come home, play saxophone in Saskatoon. they
Dulled the edge of Masamune, probably it's for the best I wager
It's analagous to finally discontinuing service on the skypager
What's my major malfunction? Is it noteworthy?
If so, can I exploit it in some way so it won't hurt me?
Otherwise, take it away. Promise me you'll always keep me safe
And sane or at the very least alleviate the pain?

Sing a song of suffering succotash, you've been had
Sing the song of solomon, the sacramental sex jam
Sacrificial ex-lamb, out like a lion
I'm going to live forever or die trying
Track Name: Jane Purves (This Song Is About Schools)
Government building, still children sit
In squalid conditions, thanks politicians!
Solid citizen can't stand the rain checks
Promised brain sex, settle for mind fucked
Little kids lined up, gentlemen fire at will
Shoot them full of shoot them full of holes, 'til they acquire a skill
Liars are killed and/or canonized
Anything that can't be quantified is ostracized
Disorganized regiments, scattered shell casings
Long forgotten hellraising, stargazing
Stark raving heartbroken ex-idealist
Tweed jacket wearing twentysomething's missing
Kids! Think about the kids you teach! Remember
Round souls in square holes each september
If she speaks then send her to be disciplined
God forbid you should ever think of listening
Sound spankings for dissident youth offending article
Strapped for chewing gum sentences end in particles
Hard work will make you free, We expect dedication
Submersion, subjugation (no subversion of education!)
Forget edification, earn grades instead
Never question lest the master turn shades of red
Christ! No you can't go to the fucking bathroom!

Mushy touchy feely hands off policy
Class hostility, some lost quality
My apologies, something's awfully
Wrong when students are philosophically
Bludgeoned into drudges packing lunches
Sunkist funfroots in the teeth instilling belief one truth
Cower when the gun shoots rap in staccato bursts
Red alert! Just let me brand the cattle first
I've had the worst feeling ever since the principle
Made targets of bad kids to prove he was invincible
Seems sensible... be feared if you can't be loved
Why do authority and ignorance seem to go hand in glove?

Canada's supposed to prioritize
Human beings and so we've been glorified
You can't say I'm not justly horrified
The way the system's been distorted by

The bottom line that makes us bottom feeders. Leaders
Made mistakes this autumn Jesus hate to break the
Bubble, but there's no victory in closing a school down
1: Nice try
2: Let alone two

Shaking heads - how'd it pass that
Students cram into crowded classes
Now the bastards've cowed the masses
Minds of brown molasses frozen
Classes chosen from small selection
Running in the hall detention
All the best and brightest kids are
Trained to court the highest bidder
The kid is five you've hired a sitter
Who can't wait to retire, so bitter
This is jive, we require better!
Why should school be a barbed wire sweater!?
POOR KIDS - the blood red ink well
Ran dry. Shrivel up and die!
Brain, brain - go away!
SIDDOWN! SHADDUP! You're too old to play!
Hearts are cold and grey and black and blue
Is this okay is what I'm asking you!
The answer is no - the cardio callous
Is a cancerous growth of malice metastasized
Bureaucracy bastardized shook ones
Didn't look ONCE in the exercise books!
Dunce caps, once raps on the knuckles with yard sticks
Now eternal if you can't learn their infernal card tricks
Pawns in the wargames, futures at stake
No sex ed, mentally neutered and spayed
You think you were dismayed in the last year?
Brace yourself for a rough ride because these cats have claws for slashing
And they've made it abundantly clear that they're perfectly prepared to do so.
Track Name: Righteous Bad-Ass
Can't tell no lies, I'm a fresh phenomenon
Mad hatter, badder than the necronomicon
Breakfast Ramadan blacklisted actress
Orthodontist, Jim Stafford, The Swamp Witch
Concussions that knock you unconscious
The rocket launches, crouch on your haunches
Ninjas haunt this place, honest injun!
Gonna have to take you in on suspicion
Lamp in your crib once you've gone to prison
Fashion an altar to my non-religion
Ganja pigeon flutter fast to pass muster
Seal the smokestack you wack ass buster
Kill the Kojak routine, get the bozack
There's no way you can pretend you didn't know that
The J was raw
The E was raw
The S was raw
The S was raw
The E was raw like you've never seen before
I'll flip you invertical to clean the floor
Wig removal, get heads open like convertibles
Maniacal laughter, they say I'm certifiable
After the massacre, rappers are half asleep
Their guts for my garters, as part of the majesty
Of life's rich tapestry, you could say it's habit forming
Like nun school... that's pretty bad. This morning
I'm uncool, hell, superlover punk!
Beats for the trunk for once, I'm on the hunt
For a brand new funk, hops, pack it in the lunch box
Unstoppable being, I'm seeing sunspots
Wheezing, lung doctor please give me one shot
Adrenalin solution, plus a puff of Ventolin
No mental institution is a match for the Jester
They should have been warned that I wasn't born yesterday
Dazzled with a vast array of fantasies I fascinate
For allay'all, I'm rapping to a volleyball, Castaway
Lyrically lacerating, Ladies Love Cool Jesse
Dangerously the hard case, harder than Scarface
Leading up the car chase on foot in my bare feet
No shoes on, Look at what I daily go through!
No-one is moving when I'm showing and proving
So no-one is getting hurt, I'm Jesse the Extrovert
I left for work late, I'm arriving what? tardy!
Laying down the law just to liven up the party
My rhymes run the gamut from cathartic and arty
To the Canadian equivalent of M&Ms - Smarties!
Not to mention hardcore rhymes written on cardboard
With black sharpie markers during breakfast at the Ardmore
Tea room. Blood loss, A plus in God class
Resume regular broadcast lineup
Word to the chronicles of Wind-Up Birds
Be still! ...? I'm absurdly skilled!
With a will to power I kill, devour and smash
You'll cower and I'll laugh for like an hour and a half!
Now we're in the last stage, gearing up for bosses
You may as well quit here and cut your losses!
You pusillanimous pugilist, repugnant republican
Hacksaw Jim Duggan lookalike slackjawed doubleknit
Butthead, you want violence? My talons are blood red!
Liquored up bad Catholic just challenged the Godhead!
Be grateful you're not dead, you hit planet rock bottom
Right? Julia Childlike, mandelbrot, sodomite
Run things into the ground, styles impudent
Shut your insolent mouth unless you're itching for an incident
Hit you with the kitchen sink first to get it over with
Feebleminded evil scientist, you're malodorous
A man your age should know the risks inherent in the enterprise
Apparently you don't though, hence your imminent demise
Kiss the sky goodbye, get comfy in your coffin
Never to return to earth... very often.
Track Name: Irrevolutionaries (totally radical)
I acquire images from TWAIN sources
As limitless pain forces the cynics to change courses
Into the rain forests, in imminent danger of
Making the mistake of seeing women as strangers. Love
Instinct, hate, wrong distinction to make
Predictions fake, a song that isn't your fate
Samba rhythms, sombre schisms and breaks. Isn't it great?
You've got a decision to make. The other fish in the lake are
Staging a prison escape. We'll flee to a hidden estate and
Dream up a mission statement of extreme positions but wait
We hate discrimination so we don't discriminate
We Indiscriminitely create villains to eliminate

Please tell me I don't know what I'm saying or that I see it wrong
But I think kids today are praying for another viet nam
So that they can be the strong voice of radical opposition
Because if the youth isn't seen as rabid it's not tradition

Having an office isn't a modern goal, having a bunker is
Anti-cloning activists are afraid of a magic homunculus
I'll get my name in the paper if I'm seen to avert disaster I'll
Oppose GM produce like agriculture was ever natural
The heart of the matter comes after all the rhetoric, snarky parlour tricks
Like alcohol in the mix to put the party in party politics
I'd hardly call it solid, it's a straw man you're buffeting
With nothing of more substance than the puppets you're disgusted with
You pump your fist and wrap yourself in a burning flag, grandmaster
Endowed with a command of the roaring sound of canned laughter
One hand clapping but the wagging tongues are lapping up
The statements and statistics, you don't even have to back it up!
The rap's enough to make you every bit the rebel squadron leader
Of the pack but what you got is packaged for the bottom feeders
Pardon me, you ought to be disgraced, a doctor molesting patients
Your operation is every bit as responsible for indoctrination
As anyone you've decried in your logical suicide bombs
While everyone under you took part in a twenty-one gun salute
Che Guevera underoos, gasmask marshmallow breakfast cereal
Lunchboxes emblazoned with the faces of your reckless heroes
That's irresponsible

I must protest

YOU would do anything to stem those feelings of impotence
YOU take a stance almost at random just to have one
YOU relish the contempt you get to fling from the moral high ground
YOU heard activist chicks were hot (dreadlocks and nosesrings baby!)
YOU heard the battle in Seattle was an awesome party
YOU bump Rage because your dad's like SUCH a nazi
YOU oppose genetics because you're ill informed and excitable

It's pathetic, watching the pigs teach lambs the cheers and chants
When they're all humans anyway, trying to fend off fears and can't
So I'll stand here and rant against the causes that I'm closest to
It hurts to do, I just hope a few can overthrow the yokes choking you
Let me be frank awhile, I don't want to spank the child
I just want to yank the chains that style you after rank and file
Say no thanks and smile, then go away and think
Mull it over soberly, draw your own conclusions
Then attack them, keep at them, you should never let them alone
Then even if they fail to fall, it's not clever to set them in stone
Wrestle Sylvester Stallone, argue physics with Steven Hawking and
Keep your balance when the challenge is to just keep breathing oxygen

Please stop me if you've heard this one or you don't think it's fair
But if you want to engage in debate, you must address the chair and not the
Choir - one letter makes all the difference in terms of effectiveness
Though the latter is more enticing as it's next to effortless

I think you're on the
Wrong track, walking in combat boots with mental fatigue
You'll eventually see the holes in that seemingly sensible creed
But let's avert the preventable, please bleed when it's appropriate
We need to stay grounded - so how did you get over it?
It's proper to know the risks when you're toppling obelisks
You should question what you thought, but it's not always the opposite
Don't sink the boat for rocking it, you've only stood up in the shallow end
That synchronized dog paddle routine? I don't think it's my style I'm in a
Submarine, keeping one nervous eye on the surface, I'm
Sure it's less than perfect but I prefer it to murder
Work smarter, not harder, let's find an alternative
Think global, act local, never been conservative
Let's pervert the world, raise your hands, I want to hear voices!
But not if you haven't been informed and made clear choices
Don't let the bastards get you down,
But don't let them set you up either - Be careful
Track Name: Strictly Do This featuring SJ the Wordburglar
What? You want what? You must be on drugs!
I make the most thugged out dons want hugs
Get your knees burned on rugs from kneeling down to me
When I'm feeling ornery. Honorary coroner
You'll suffer from a coronary. I'm out of the ordinary.
Crypt keepers shiver and admit I'm sort of scary
While the orthodoxy would suggest that I'm sort of snotty
Also naughty like a toddler. Stockpile bottled water
Crocodile tears, my style clears the hurdles
Sample based (sample based), the only thing I fear is the Turtles
That's right I'm Oroku Saki, bitch, the trouble's obvious
I played a pickup game with the H E double hockey sticks
The properties of floppy disks are tragically fragile
My tongue blurs when it forms words, it's magically agile
It's bad to be facile, so I take great pains
To come off with the ferocity of irate freight trains
Like the ones my mate James covers with paint stains
Get at me dogs, it's brutal pitting poodles versus great danes
Hate chains our hearts and restricts our purpose
I consider it worthless. Yo check me out I'm picture perfect
Go Ess Jay, it's your birthday in spite of the calendar's date
Give it up for my pal ninja dreg! I wouldn't want to share his
challenger's fate... he's tough!

[Essjae] How tough?
[Jesse] So tough you'll be sufferin'!
[Essjae] Coming correct from Church street to Dufferin
[Jesse] You kids are small like MUSCLE men
[Essjae] We're large like Captain Action
[both] J D and S J - pure rapping satisfaction

I'm eating rappers like food because they have bat attitudes
They're crude, and look like something I poo'd
Out my buttcheeks a week ago, the unique paprika flow
Comic geek who calls Chuck Zeto a ho
Really though (yo) you better come with the beats and cuts
Plus you really need delivery like pizza hut
No buts, no ifs and definitely no maybes
CRAZY... like that lady
My references make sense like an encyclopaedia
My rhymes don't make you shit, they make you bleed diarrhea
Mama mia! Cut squares to octagons
Make italian rappers say "Oh no, not-a Sean!"
It's on the down low, but I got Tony Soprano,
Joe Pantoliano and Barry Manilow on the piano
Down at the Copa Cabana, just ask
I was undercover, dressed as Cobra Commander!
No propaganda, you'll never ask for your cash back!
Heads who like rap be like "Who was that on that last track?"
The extra liquor in your knapsack,
The 21 to your blackjack, the picnic basket in your hatchback!
If you act wack, you're gonna leave in a stupour
'Cause SJ's ill... it's not a rumour!
Track Name: Get Fresh
From Babylon through Camelot to Avalon, the Battlebot
Busting out styles from the krush groove catalogue
Idiomatic king of all things radical
Up on it like static cling, fresh mode grammatical
Hardcore furious, game tight and affable
Soundclash bombastic, downright laughable
Baltimore, apple core, who's your best friend y'all?
Shopping for shoes at the west end... mall
Hallmark Sentinel, mental hysteria
Bad rap hotter than Central America
Gentle of character, vicious vocabulary
Nice guy but a bitch of an adversary
Any means necessary, limited time offer
Only while supplies last, internet crime stopper
Spiderman spinneret itinerant webcrawler
Of general interest, inveterate yesh y'aller
. With a fist full of dollars and nonsense
Willing and able from the table of contents
Through to the epilogue and any appendices
MCs never see my friendlier tendencies
Nice guy but a stinker of an enemy
Known to be the number one thinker of the century
Ego will eventually eclipse every orbiting
Satellite. Good call forfeiting the battle!
Mic Controller star studded Granola bar
Red blooded rapping duke, steering by the polar star
Heavy metal meadowlark lemon meringue pie
Hollowed out pride, just an all-around strange guy
Followed outside of the petshop by kittens
No kidding, ciphers get pissed off by my writtens
Freestyle swimrace, coming in last place
Newborn babies give you the gasface
(zu zu zu zu)
Trim the mustache, get plenty of bed rest
There is but one law and the whole of it shall be GET FRESH

Stylized, five miles high with wild eyes
Suggest that I'm not fresh and I'll cry
Sensitive modern man waterboy wondergirl
Part Liz Thigpen, part kingpin of the underworld
Thinking of a master plan with sweaty palms
Landcruisers can't lose the man who's already gone
Steady on, champ, keep your eye on trophies
I run with a hundred percent Hawai'ian Sophies
. And another thing, my posse's on Gottingen, rapping
Flexing and flossing, there's a lot that can happen
Guardian devout, but there's a ghost that haunts you
It's a party in my mouth, and I'll cry if I want to!
One two cheque please, the pimp of the nation
Wizard of Idioteque, Improvisation
This simple dictation runs roughshod over your steno pad
Nice guy but a godfather in Leningrad
I'm able to rock the mic viciously 'cause
I'm Bulletproof, the way Thom Yorke (Wishes He Was)
Jesse never squishes bugs, but insects hide
Nonetheless because he's Fezzik from the Princess Bride
The Friendly Giant, my theme song employs recorders
With patience, my rap destroys the borders of nations
Interactive insurrection, brake at the intersection
Given to introspection and keeping it interesting
Like it's going out of style and the fact is, it seems to be
No-one really understands what it means to me
It's not that I hate or am anti-rap
It's just that most rappers are wack and I stand by that
And the fact we all flip when we hear some dudes are cool
or interesting, that's the exception that proves the rule
New school wreck shop class clown home study
Well versed scholar and I rap like nobody
Hell's worst holler can't strain my vocal cords
High school loser but a baller on the local boards
Lord Rhythm, sporting traditional headdress
I've got my mission and you can't tell me it isn't to get FRESH.

We didn't land on planet rock
Planet rock landed on us!
Track Name: 7 Days = 9 Months
One day, the cosmos will expand and emerge
And divide like any cell does, and that commands courage
The woman and the man merge, driven by primal urge
Lighting up their nerves with a sort of power surge
Love fulfils its function and then they're showered and done
About to raise the population to the power of one
It's exponential, excuse me if I wax sentimental
Monumental, remember that the act's consequential
Be gentle, baby, it's an essential process biologically
We're programmed robots, designed without apology
To live and love and die and live and love and die and live
And the benevolent Godless nothingness made babies cute for a reason
Fat cheeks and shining eyes can steel us against the whining cries
Time flies, you were once no bigger than a dime in size
Climb inside the warmth for now, it won't last forever though
Still, until the day you die, you'll be no less a miracle
Childhood is timeless in a sense, no small kindness
Beautiful, correct as usual, your highness
Even afflicted with Down's or blindness, heart problems or deafness
A life is sacred and precious, I just can't express the freshness!

On the first day, she rested. Light came on the seventh
When Saint Peter's gate opened and the child joined us in heaven
Here we are! How do you like it? Don't worry, you'll warm up to it.
Or I hope you will, in any case, it's all there is - we're stuck with it.

Life is a nice place actually, there's even value inherent to sorrow
Just think... a baby yesterday and a new parent tomorrow

And I know there's times you've got to view the whole endeavor warily
I'm not saying it's not your choice, I'm just saying choose carefully

Washable or disposable? Breastfeeding is glorious!
To hell with stoneage legislators, they're just scared of amazon warriors!
Tits have a given purpose and if it isn't served, it's sad
You have every right to be nervous but you're gonna be the perfect dad
It seems arduous, you wonder if it's worth the trouble or not
While lesbian couples go to the bank and gay couples adopt
The whole world procreates, and sure we need to slow the rate
But we still need to celebrate every single stroke of fate

You are an impossible occurance, unique and elegant
Whether you're small as a mouse, big as an elephant, a little slow or possess a freak intelligence
It's never inaccurate to say that you are miraculous
Sin doesn't exist and all conceptions are immaculate
For what I'm lyrically worth, even if it's unbearable or worse
Every living creature is a marvel... it's the miracle of birth
Track Name: Subpoena Collider
For the most part inoffensive
BUT when I use a bad word it's meant
To give my frustration a vent and advertisement
Sketching in the textbook, extroverted sentinel blues
Circus tent dungarees and sensible shoes
I'm not elated with spaceships, much as I love moonwalking
Anthro-apologist, Han Solo, Chewbacca
Demolishes manticores, chimeras and hybrids
To component parts, cinnamon hearts under my eyelids
Style is paramount and tantamount to oxygen
(Skills) before I wear 'em out, I'm handing out a box of 'em
Like nothing. I'm awesome in the hearts and minds of dozens while
My rhymes have racing car designs and that fresh out the oven smell
Butter in my mouth doesn't melt, word to mother. We
Serve a dope subpoena and freestyle at discovery
The gavel's staccato rap performs an ostenato
With my heartbeat, even if it's dark we cast a shadow


Supermodel compliancy check failed. Standards raised.
Hawks versus handsaws. Horseshoes, handgrenades.
Panda bear fetishists standing there in their underwear
Innovate infiltrate integrate, ninety-eight degrees centigrade
Puffer fish, pantywaist. Encrypted, corrupted and erased
Genius in a monkey suit like panties made of fancy lace
Andy March: all that and a fistfull of candy hearts
Our official manifesto is nothing but offhand remarks
We practise demanding arts and craft outstanding works
Giving the finger to freeloading fans & slipping the tongue to manhandlers
Electronic devices give me command over myself
With the manners of a minister and the antlers of an elk
With my manservant's help we make hamburger of herbs, lots of spice
Preferred by connoisseurs of the absurd plot device
Deus ex mechanical pencil used to write prehensile tales
The raspy voice a file in the cake enjoyed in continental jails
. Snail's . pace . suits me . just fine
Percale pretty pillowcase, lusting for Dustin Diamond
Hello Kitty full of grace. This clearly illustrates
Nothing in particular like Ford's speech at Milliways
I'm secular, christ but you're a hard master, Dracula
I'm not so much Ninja Scroll as Card Captor Sakura
I can go farther, faster, accuracy suffers though
Be advised to keep your fingers well outside buffer zone
This is for lovers only, others need not apply
Lady that means you, plus the planet rockabye
Baby.to the pop say up jump the rhythm of a
Bang bang pattycake and take no prisoners
Inquisitive visitors may examine parameters
To determine a permanent stance on famine in Canada
Handsome janitor waltzes with principal's youngest daughter
Charmed I'm sure but there's some kind of fungus on her
That could cause a lung disorder, nevertheless, pucker up
The preening, grasping Humperdink will never impress Buttercup
I'll endeavour to guess your weight and date of birth from the sound of your voice
Astounding talents like mine are world renowned and rejoiced
It all comes down to a choice but whatever, no pressure
It's the go-getter, mic molester, court jester
Protestor, yesterday's news broadcaster
Pastor of the parish, embarrassinly garish
Nightmarish Dana Dane insane in the insidious brain
Slobodan Milosevic, Robotron videogame
Focus of the media blame, living in a city of shame
Aimlessly dangerous, famous to boot and it's like that
Track Name: Rhythm Is King
I'm a rock group, semiprecious Stones that Roll
With no moss on my vicious microphone control
You don't know me though, since going to school
I'm the only soul that ain't no-one's fool
Listen, homie loc, it's a smorgasbord
Since they thrown me out, going door-to-door
Romeo sort of scored in the sport of war
Against the king of kings, I got a ring that blings, like
Na na na na na na na na na na na Batman!
Na, na na na na na na na Batman!
Batman, na na na na na na na Batman!
Nananananananananananana BATMAN!
Girls in Japan is the sassy mo frassy
(Utsukushi! Sugoi!) It's like "Atashi mo, papi!"
Happy to rap with the fire brigade
Tiger stripe, Gatorade, gay pride parade!
We ride for days and days and days and
Days and days and days and days and days and
It stays amazing! Internat combustion!
Hardcore credit card criminal suction!
The seminal something-something, you know the debt load
Stayed up late, 'til I straight up explode
On the west coast, boys. Impressed? No!?
That's it, I'm serving poison pesto
Noise in escrow - legal term politickin'
Strange, perverted wordsmith solid citizen kane
(this shit is insane)
Don't laugh at me, Cassidy, hop along
You can treat the doctor wrong, but not for long
I wrote lots of songs, some of them had cursing
You know what that means, I'm a bad person!
THUG, rolling up in a Persian rug.
Nine finger fucker, dispersing drugs
Hated worse than hugs at a junior high school dance
Hello, my name is - Jesse Dangerous!
Prick your fingers for the rich and famous!
Individual bitch in the pictute's nameless!
Secular satanists! Vehicular payments!
Everybody loves me like Raymond
Chandler Bing Crosby Stills Nash and Young MC J and Kool G Rap
Rap, let's see how far I can kick it
I'll piss you off and get paid, like a parking ticket
In a darkened thicket, with the girl of my choice
I've got my head in my hands and my heart in my throat and the world in my voice
I'm in the kitchen with Dinah and circumstances is stressin'
You got a sister in China, now would you answer the question?
I've got an ounce of prevention, I'm gonna snap from the tension
I've got to find a profession, or at least some direction
I'm dictating convention while escaping detection
It's my stated position that constitutes a confession
At the roots of depression, there lies my true disposition
And plus my stab at expression of convoluted opinion
Another serf, surfing the web of my computer's dominion
I try to be clever and pleasant, but I'm forever a peasant
That's it, as in second class citizen
That's all that matters when you're north of West Madison.
Track Name: Naked Branch Musings
With eyes tilted skyward, and conscious of a cool breeze
To clear my troubled conscience in late autumn fashion
Apparel in peril.. barrel bottom scratching at my christmas list
I reflect on livelihood and businesses' capriciousness
Those blues are bespectacled; depression; choose a respectable
Profession; Make use of your testicles and put bread in the oven
Life thinks it's so funny, like har har jesse
Remember when you looked into an R R SP?
My response time extends, rather than shaving it down
I have cheques and debit to spend, but no savings account
Hand to mouth like a coughing fit... A sorcery apprentice
He tidies up his room and can't afford to see the dentist
My mouth hurts so bad. It's galling me
But what steps can the unskilled take towards solvency?
Education is a commodity I should, perhaps, invest in
Rather than naps and resting or even raps, honestly
The question begs an answer while even research daunts me
A dilligent player of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire...
The home game uniform is all I've ever known about
The flightless bird is grateful that his mother hasn't thrown him out
That is to say... my apartment is my own, technically
But countless times my mother's loan has rescued me
I'm behind in the game and it's due to my frame of mind
I'm somehow occupied and idle at the same time

Getting stupid, like some kid said in the past
It's hard to make headway with your head in your ass
Leaden foot pedestrian, I dread treading the path
Never cool in the first place, finish the race dead last
Getting stupid, like some kid said in the past
It's hard to make headway with your head in your ass
Leaden foot pedestrian, I dread treading the path
Never cool in the first place, finish the race dead last

And yet... the sky is so blue and the crisp air so invigorating
Vitalizing and liberating, I can feel the twitterpating
Influence of nature; innocence exists to be found in the
Colours of the leaves in the trees and on the ground
Everywhere, all around me, people they pretend
That the seasons don't portend that their life is gonna end
It's a god given law, as the Mothersbaugh brothers noted
And I'm dead grateful when I can sugarcoat it
Although said playfully, I think it may resonate
In the breasts of the likeminded, who blink when they hesitate
To drink from the holy grail and shrink from the everyday
Fiendishly clever, they instinctively meditate
Principled, given both to heaviness and levity
Controlling it, knowing that the soul of wit is brevity
Devastating charm et cetera veteran of schoolyard tussles
Middle class hurt feelings at the mercy of cruel, hard muscles
Mysteries; selective topics; buried in Detective Comics
Reading all media, Encyclopaedia Brown breeding ground
Bleeding heart needing arts, crafts and laughs, the class clown
Lying in the grass and staring... face up, ass down
Eye spying shapes in the accumulated cumulus
Raised curtain, tragic comedy, pathos made it humourous
Paperweight champion, passive basketcase of the massive
Raking up the leaves while he grieves for their passage

Getting stupid, like some kid said in the past
It's hard to make headway with your head in your ass
Leaden foot pedestrian, I dread treading the path
Never cool in the first place, finish the race dead last
Getting stupid, like some kid said in the past
It's hard to make headway with your head in your ass
Leaden foot pedestrian, I dread treading the path
Never cool in the first place, finish the race dead last

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